


Walking the Pineapple

by xenopraetor



Category: Psych
Genre: Collars, Cop Fetish, Dominance, Dominant Submission, Leashes, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Shawn Spencer Don't Need No Plot, Uniform Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-18
Updated: 2014-01-18
Packaged: 2018-01-09 04:28:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1141436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xenopraetor/pseuds/xenopraetor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One-shot of Shawn swinging by Lassie's place to drop something off, staying for the hot sex. Inspired by a conversation with irinokat and otachistongue involving Shawn being the K9 unit to Lassie's sexy street cop... and Shawn's been a bad dog.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Walking the Pineapple

**Author's Note:**

  * For [alienfirst](https://archiveofourown.org/users/alienfirst/gifts), [irinokat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/irinokat/gifts).



It was midnight when Shawn slipped through the back door of Lassiter's home, figuring it somehow made more sense than knocking on the front. Not that anything Shawn did make much sense anyway. Glancing around, he strode into the hallway with a packet of files in one hand and a pineapple with a leash wrapped around it under the opposite arm. The files just happened to be something he had 'borrowed' from Lassiter during lunch one day, and figured he might as well just swing by and drop them off again. Unannounced, of course. What was the fun in doing otherwise?

"What in God's name are you doing in my house?"

Shawn jumped, turning to see Lassiter through the doorway to what looked like his bedroom in the process of unbuttoning his cuffs.

"Just wanted to drop something off that you left behind at lunch the other day, didn't want to bother you with the doorbell." Shawn walked into the room much to Lassiter's dismay, not waiting for approval. "A better question is, though, why are you dressed as a street cop?"

Lassiter rolled his eyes, letting out a long sigh that was basically shorthand for 'please stop speaking.' "One, you're holding a pineapple and a dog leash, and you honestly think that is a better question?! Two, in what world is breaking and entering less of a bother than ringing a doorbell? I could arrest you right on the spot!"

"Bringing out the handcuffs already, Lassie? How kinky!" Shawn gave his typical grin that Lassiter oh-so-hated while absentmindedly tossing his fruit on the bed and holding out the file packet to the detective. Lassiter pinched the bridge of his nose in irritation, snatching the files away from the little pest.

"Can you please leave before I drag you to lockup myself?"

"But we haven't even played sexy cop yet!"

"Out!!"

"Oh come onnnnn," Shawn whimpered, very intentionally stomping his feet over and planting his forehead on Lassiter's shoulder. "You can give me a strip tease!"

Lassiter's lips formed a tight, thin line. He knew deep in his gut he didn't want to actually have to arrest Spencer for something as ridiculous as this. Yet he also felt rather uncomfortable with his behavior, not completely sure these advances weren't genuine instead of Spencer's stupid habit of being a complete idiot. They couldn't be genuine... right?

"Only if you'll be my K-9 unit," Lassiter made an attempt at a joke, but he didn't feel particularly funny saying it. It sounded better in his head. Hearing himself say the words aloud sounded oddly... erotic, and he wasn't quite sure that was a bad thing, either.

"Sweet!" Shawn threw himself onto the bed, yanking the leash over and sending the pineapple rolling off the side and across the room. Kicking off his shoes, he sat up and presented the leash cheerfully, a red collar dangling from one end. Lassiter didn't know what to make of the situation. Was Spencer still just messing around? It was really hard to tell sometimes, and his stomach twisted trying to figure out how to handle what was going on. It was rare that he felt so clueless with something, but this was definitely one of those rarities.

Taking the leash, he coughed awkwardly. "I uh... I was just joking."

Yet he still found himself instinctively undoing the collar and slipping it around Shawn's neck. Fastening it snugly, he entwined part of the leash around his palm and looked at the odd sight of Shawn Spencer sitting on his bed, collared up like a dumbass dog. Something like a golden retriever, with the stupid smile and inability to shut up when wanted. Yet there was something pleasant about holding the leash, Lassiter realized, feeling like for once he was actually in control of the petulant hack. He felt like he could do anything to him, and it was exhilarating. Realizing he was holding his breath, he let out a long sigh, breathing a bit heavily as he stood at the bedside.

"So about that strip tease!" Shawn broke the silence, slipping a fiver behind Lassiter's belt, very deliberately brushing his knuckles against his tightening trousers. "You can't tell me you don't wanna take those pants off!"

Lassiter glanced down, seeing the now visible bulge behind the fabric of his pants. He swore under his breath, trying to figure out how he quite let himself end up in this situation in the first place. Now very aware of the throbbing of his groin he couldn't exactly ignore it, either. His breath continued to grow heavier as he danced ideas around in his head, each one more inappropriate than the last. Shawn may have the most annoying smile, irritating expressions, stupid hair... but he was hardly unattractive. Lassiter just had to figure out how to stay in control and keep Spencer in line, which was pretty much impossible to do in nearly every situation. Finally taking a deep, shaky breath, he undid his zipper and slipped out a still hardening cock.

"Lick it."

"Dude, that's not how a strip-tease works! You're supposed to entice me! "

Lassiter yanked hard on the lead, roughly pulling the other man closer. "Be a good dog and obey. Lick it!"

"Fine, but I'm keeping my five," Shawn grumbled, snatching the money back from Lassiter's belt. Staring Lassie's fat cock down for a moment almost distastefully, he leaned in and licked it about as unattractively as anyone could. Mouth wide open, tongue dripping saliva, he slathered it all over the cock; taking small moments to pay special attention to certain areas. Lassiter exhaled shakily, enjoying the feeling of wet warmth running all over his sensitive member. Grabbing Spencer by the hair, he pushed his cock into his mouth and moaned at how amazing it felt. So wet and hot, any remaining insecurity about what was happening disappeared and was quickly overtaken by lust.

Fully aroused and hard, Lassiter pushed Spencer onto the bed and pinned him in between his hips and the mattress. "Take off your pants and grab the bottle from the second drawer."

Shawn did so without protest, rushing to free his arousal and disrobe as Lassiter began removing his own clothing.

"God, Lassie," Shawn gasped as Lassiter pulled his undershirt off. "Put the over shirt back, leave it unbuttoned. You look so good in it." He squirmed under Lassiter's weight, trying to resist jacking off right at that moment. He wanted it so bad, to be touched and roughed around. There was only so much he could get out of the random chicks he brought home from bars or diners. Nothing was quite the same as being pleasured by a man nearly twice his size and much stronger, and Shawn was glad that he got Lassie to respond to his advances the exact way he wanted. The detective may be stubborn and boneheaded, but there were some ways to push him in the right direction.

Squeezing lube onto his hand, Lassiter roughly grabbed Shawn by the cock, coating it as he pulled his grip down the length. His mouth curved into a satisfied smile as Spencer whimpered like a little puppy under his touch. Running his thumb gently down the soft skin of Spencer's balls, he finally reached his hole, tracing a few circles around it with his middle finger before sliding it in. Excited by the whimpers this action was met with, he inserted another finger and pressed inside against Shawn's most sensitive spots.

"Oh god, please," Shawn begged. "Just fuck me already. I don't want to wait anymore!" He squirmed, squeezing tight around Lassiter's fingers.

"Good dog," Lassiter smirked, sliding his fingers out of Shawn to replace them with his cock. Inhaling sharply, he slid his lube-slick head into the tight hole, sensitive to every twitch and squeeze of the body around it. His brow furrowed tightly as he plunged inside Shawn fully, gasping for air. It had been so long since he had a good fuck that it took all his restraint not to just pound into Spencer's ass until it hurt. Instead he started slowly, building up speed until he hit a pace that felt good. So, so good.

"Speed up, you're going too slow." Shawn whined.

"I didn't say you could talk."

"Come on, man. An eighty-year-old could drill faster than that."

Lassiter did his best to ignore him, keeping up his even pace.

Shawn sighed dramatically. Lassie may be stubborn but he was definitely predictable. "You're like a sex socialist. Why don't we just have a communist thing going here where everybody gets shitty sex from you, instead of just one good fuck right here? I bet liberals fuck better than this."

"Why you mouthy little bitch," Lassiter growled. Spencer's smug grin just made him even angrier. "You want hard sex? I'll pound you hard enough that all that come out of that bitch mouth are squeaks. This ought to shut you up."

Wrapping the leash once around Shawn's cock, Lassiter grabbed him roughly by the hips, picking up the pace of his thrusts until he was lost in the feeling of ramming deep into that tight asshole. All his inhibitions melted away as the sole thing on his mind became the slapping of his hips against Spencer's ass, the hot wet pressure squeezing around his thrusting cock, the sound of his increasingly louder grunts mixed with the moans and cries of the other man. Despite being in as good shape as he was, his thighs began to resist him, burning in pain the harder he thrust but it just felt too good to slow down. Don't stop, he told himself. Just don't... ngh... don't stop.

Shawn came first, unable to keep his hands off his own dick any longer. Between the tugging of the leash, his grasping fingers, and Lassie pounding him in just the right spot his body exploded in blinding hot pleasure. He writhed in ecstasy, gasping for air between cries and spurting gooey white into Lassiter's dark chest hair. The pounding in his ass was relentless, reducing him to a mewling wreck on the sweat-dampened sheets.

Leaning over Shawn's heaving chest, Lassiter put all his remaining strength into heavy thrusts, grunting and grabbing at the sheets in fistfuls. He pushed his cock as deep as it would go, warmth spreading rapidly until his body couldn't contain it anymore. Muscles tensing completely, the intense heat erupted outwards like a volcano. His cock felt like a fire hose on full blast, spraying out its load until there was nothing left. He had been needing this so badly, needing to release all his built up tension in one tantamount blast that was so intense it felt like he'd been building up to it for years. Even better that it could be in domination of that chatty little shit.

Feeling Shawn stir underneath him, Lassiter became suddenly aware of where he was and what he was doing like his body was sprinting and his mind only just caught up. Sucking in a deep breath he relaxed his fingers, realizing he had them wrapped around fistfuls of Shawn's thick hair. Pushing himself up off the bed, he slid out of Spencer, falling to his side and letting his whole body go limp.

"So how's my bad dog?" Lassiter smirked weakly, squeezing Shawn's face.

"Oh so I'm yours now, huh?" Shawn tried to think of something witty to say, but blanking.

Lassie slid his fingers under the collar around Shawn's neck. "What do you think this is for?" Hooking his fingers underneath, he tugged on it to bring Shawn in for a kiss.

Instead, he got Shawn's sloppy tongue licking all over his face.

"Arf, arf!" Shawn grinned. Lassiter scowled in response and roughly shoved Shawn, sending him toppling off the side of the bed.

"Oh come on! We were totally having a moment!"

Lassiter sighed and rolled over. Now seemed a good time to doze off for the night.

"Hey, a little help here? Lassie? ...Lassie?"


End file.
